This morning my mom awake me and ask me go out with her... send my bro to schooll.. he say 1st day don't know where the class wa... ok lo.. i follow lo.. nvm de also... hahax... when at car i very sleepy... when i wan to slp thn my mom talk with me... 5a.m. more only tat time... "ur dad sick dao very li hai oh... yesterday go see {singsang (zhong yi) } tat ppl say ur dad will 'zhong feng' anytime..." FUCK!! ask u... wat ur feel if u hear tat?? morning... sky still black black de lo... my feel is... don't know want how to say... got the same feel when my dad stay at SMC.. Nov or dec of 2007.. me de 'fan yin'...
but i still can bergagar... hahax... *wu nai* cry la... but no sound and no ppl know tat one... i blive all ppl try b4 la.. not just me..
after tat go pasar... nothing important... thn at home.. my mom ask me go bank thn me no wan to out cz i wan to talk with my sis about tat.. thn my mom super angry and at there scold scold scold... ok... she out le... talk with my sis.. u all no 1 ppl can imagine wat my sis say i tell u.. if imagine dao de hua thn u call me.. i spend u eat japanese food.. jk.. she said.. "is he wan de ma.. everyday go out drink till wan drunk liao just back home.. cheh u tell me hv use meah?? open door to he in still wan face black black see me.. " thn i say... tat means u hope ur dad 'zhong feng lo??' shock? with the fucking ans of my sis?? me sad at the same time... and replied her say i don't want to talk with her liao... after tat i tell my mom wat she say.. my mom angry and call her scold her and ask her.. [if your dad no go out drink with da lao ban hw ur dad get work?? if no work de hua who gv his house member money?? you?? or wait u gv money?? but ur dad very sure tat we all will die liao if wait dao u gv money to help this house...cz u never take 1sen home since u come back from miri.. how many years liao??] thn use leg think also know tat she will call me and scold me... then quarrel with her lo... not remember what liao but i know at the last i ask her move out from this house...
me don't know what i do now is good or right or not.. but i know i help my dad... and my dad is very very disappointed to my sis... he told me last last Sunday... me don't know wat can i do to help my dad but at least i know.. don't hurt my dad anymore... especially don't let my sis hurt him... my dad heart not good... And me don't know wat can i do to stop my sis everyday out go drink use money.. and more.. she think everybody need her or wat de.. but we know tat her friend just use her only.. cz she have car ma... and money spend they all drink... stupid!! when just u wake up and realise all of this???!!
At last i wan to thanks my dear.. rachel.. "don't hope want believe" i will remember de... and dear jessie.. always be my lap sap tong... maybe u will feel dao super fan.. but thanks u no fan dao run... hahax.. joyce leah?? always find her dou at k'ngau de.. hahax... thanks all of u...
aiya...
ReplyDeletedon't know why time not ngam de.. T^T
now is 12.43p.m lo... jan 5th tiam..
If i just read like that and already can cry de hua, i really can't bear to think of what you are going through.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how to get in touch with you.. Seems like all the ways i use also cannot get a reply from you. So i guess I'll just leave what i wanna say now here.
You remember what we talked about last night? I really don't understand why it is always one problem goes and another one comes. Maybe you're right, it's not the timing.. It's not really the phase.. But life is like that and we need to see what is the problem that we face.
Really think dao dou fan.. Haiz.. Maybe like what you wrote the other day.. Better don't think too much about a matter.. Coz it is like a maze that we might not be able to get out of..
We may always ask why this or why that.. Why my life is like this or why my life can't be like his or hers... With all the why(s), we may never get the answer we want. But let me share something that i have learned.
I have learned that in this life we cannot understand why our life is the way it is. It is all planned before we even was born. But one thing is for sure, what we face in this whole life of ours, is not unbearable. Everything that is put into our lives for us to go through, whether the good or bad, is just for us to grow stronger, to have faith. Even if we think deeper, there are many people out there who are in worse conditions than us. Maybe you will have a different thinking, but God will never give us more hardship than we can face. That is what i strongly believe.
Although i may not be the best person to say all this(seeing that i am also struggling with my own life), but i really wish and hope that you will be strong and stand firm on your ground.
Thanks for all the support and comfort that you have given to me in my days of sadness. With that, i believe that my dark clouds are clearing away. So, now when you are confuse and don't know what you can do, i hope you will always remember your friends who are always here for you. Love you, my dear.. The dark clouds will clear one day.. Stay strong and believe.
thank ya my friend.. just now me out from 12.30p.m. more i think.. hahax..
ReplyDeletethn now just go home... me nothing liao de really... anyways, thanks...and.. you no say fei hua la really...